Balancing Multiple Households During Special Occasions

As The Co•Wife Coach, I have witnessed many challenges and struggles that come with living in a polygynous family. One of the biggest challenges is balancing multiple households during special occasions like Ramadan and Eid.

Ramadan is a month of spiritual reflection and fasting, while Eid is a joyous celebration that marks the end of Ramadan. However, for women in a polygynous family, these occasions can be stressful and challenging. It can be difficult to balance time and resources between multiple households, and feelings of jealousy, insecurity, and resentment can arise.

But what if you are not Muslim and don’t celebrate Ramadan and Eid? Can the same tips and solutions apply to you? Absolutely!

Even if you don’t celebrate these occasions, the challenges of balancing multiple households and managing relationships with your co-wives are still very real (during holidays and special events). So here are some valuable solutions and tips that can apply to you on your polygynous journey:

  1. Communication is key: It is important to communicate with your husband and co-wives about your boundaries, ideas and concerns. Discuss how you can work together to make the most of special occasions or holidays that are important to your family. Be mindful of your energy when communicating. Your energy is the fuel that will drive the words and body language outwardly.
  2. Respect each other’s traditions: It is important to be considerate and respectful of each other’s traditions and find ways to incorporate them into your celebrations. This can help to create a sense of unity and belonging. If it’s something you don’t understand or agree upon, be kind and respectful in your words and energy as you communicate your stance.
  3. Take care of yourself: It is important to prioritize self-care and to take breaks when needed. Make sure to do things that make you happy and reduce stress. This is a good time to add more of reflective prayers during this time; especially the nights of Ramadan. Even during the month of Ramadan, you are still responsible for filling your cup (figuratively).


These are just a few quick tips to help you navigate the challenges of being a part of a polygynous family, even if you don’t celebrate Ramadan and Eid. If you want to learn more about how to thrive in a polygynous family, join our upcoming HER POLY•GROUP SESSIONS. Our sessions are designed to empower and support women in polygynous journeys, regardless of their background or beliefs.


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